If it has taken you 20, 30 years
Or most of your life
To experience love as abuse
In different forms or shapes
Either physical, sexual
Verbal, mental
Psychological, financial and spiritual
Or all of the above combined
With all the confusion
Of what love means to you
As your normal reality,
It definitely will take you a while
To recognize what it is
Push and pull pattern
Love and hate pattern
Controlling pattern
And many more patterns
With unemotionally available
Or abusive people in your life
To unlearn them
How much of the love you experienced
Is control?
How much of the love you experienced
Is destructive criticism?
How much of the love you experienced
Is blame, shame and guilt?
How much of the love you experienced
Is domination?
How much of the love you experienced
Is anger, rage and hatred?
How much of the love you experienced
Is fighting like battlefields or war?
How much of the love you experienced
Is manipulation?
How much of the love you experienced
Is fear?
How much of the love you experienced
Is intimidation?
How much of the love you experienced
Is everything else other than
True lovingness and caring
Without control and abuse
That you were never taught?
Would you like to disrupt and destroy
All the definitions of
What you think love means
That actually isn’t?
Unlearn it all
Deprogram it all
Teach you all over again
With God as your Source
It definitely will not take those many years
To change them
Along with your willingness
To choose awareness
Along with all the tools
That are right for you
Along with your commitment
To uprooting the patterns
To making totally different choices
To creating completely different realities
That you have never considered before
As your new normal realities
That are light, expansive and joyful for you
It does take work
Not in a wishy-washy kind of way
It does take commitment
What matters is your willingness
To take advantage of any and all triggers
To work on, through and beyond triggers
As much as you can
If you would like to
That is self-responsibility
That is emotionally available for you
That is compassion for you
We can only be emotionally available
And have compassion for others
As much as we can for ourselves
All it takes is your willingness
To choose awareness
All it takes is your willingness
To see and acknowledge total truth
The good, the bad and the ugly
Without denying it
Without rejecting it
As long as we deny it,
We can do nothing about it
We will make the same choices
Over and over and over and over again
The same story never ends
And it no longer works for you
What if you create a totally different story
That ends all suffering and
Brings you joy?
Total truth will set you free
Even if it means you might have to
Feel the deep pain beyond measure
You are and will still be safe through it
Allow it to come to the surface and out
Then it’s gone
Goodbye, adios to that pain
What is left is YOU
Your space
Your knowing
Your wisdom
Your lightness and expansion
Your inner peace and ease with you
Your choices from a totally different place
Of different possibilities
Of those who are right for you
Those who are emotionally available for you
Those who are empowering to you
You are moving forward and creating
Your bright, brilliant future
Without the baggage of the past
You are on your way
Of coming Home with YOU
You got this. One step at a time.
- Phuong
